Upcoming Trip

This is strange. I guess I haven’t really thought about this trip at all. I mean I have but I haven’t I like to think that I’ve always been ready but the reality is I haven’t been back since 2005. Or 2007. A long fucking time. There’s a sense of guilt that I know will come up. I don’t want to ignore that. I feel it every time we go. Family members exited to see us, crying and then family members sad to see us go crying . Filipinos cry about anything. Good or bad. I know I do. I’m sharing a very vulnerable part myself with Ed. The lands my parents came from. The places they left behind. But always return to. If there is any lesson worth relearning, it’s that. We can always rebuild.